Still Delirious....

I think I still am not in the mood to talk too much here... I am still trying to figure out what the problem is with my self... These thoughts I have are but another dilemma I am facing....

I Really Should Think of Better Things...

Life maybe giving me another trials on the part of thinking a lot... But I guess I really should just try to focus on what is really important to me...

Im Now Out of Work... OJT Work That Is....

Whew... I am unofficially done with my hours with my OJT... I just need to get some things that I need from my workstation to pass them to my adviser at school...

I am quite excited going back to school without worrying of being on a job in the morning, making my daily routine so boring... And in this point, when I am not gonna worry about my OJT anymore... I can focus more on my other subjects in school cause since I have been working on my OJT, I was quite not that getting the habit of reading my notes earlier before any exams... I tend to cram so hard that I think my prelims grade will not be that good to see... Oh well... I can still do better for the next terms... I can try do do better I guess... I can also focus on trying to get back my guitar-playing skills to a better situation... I mean, I can try to learn more than just the usual riffs that I play... But its gonna be hard if I am gonna get myself better...

But I guess It's one thing that I can do to forget some things too... I can't really say what they are... But whenever these thoughts come up... I really need something to do to keep myself sane....

Absatively(?) A New Year Flipness....

“When you can't remember why

you're hurt, that's when you're

healed.”

I'm a flip... A real one that is... And this year that came might give me more things that will keep my flipness in tune...


First up is how I celebrated my New Year with my family... It was solemnly... simple... We had a simple dinner which only means another simple celebration almost every New Year... Well at least we were together celebrating...

Next is my dilemma over my expectations about this year... And I can only conclude that I really have a bad habit of having great expectations... The end of the past year was not that quite good for me... I just made another stupid expectation due to my wishful thinking... Now I have to find a way to forget about it... Though I had the experience almost the same a very long time ago... As expected of me, I was a stupid as ever... Now what I am trying to do is find a way on how to forget the past, try to get over it and move forward and try to be happy...

And that I guess... Is the hardest thing that I can do right now....

Just Like What Richard Mayhew Thought....

Richard had noticed that events were cowards: they didn't occur singly, but instead they would run in packs and leap out at him all at once.

Neil Gaiman

Neverwhere

This day just started like hell as usual... I woke up late, thought that my back will be better, but unfortunately I think my back should really get a good massage to remove that pain... Then comes the worst part of my morning... I was traffic like more than hell.... I was travelling from what supposed to be a thirt- minute trip from our place to my OJT workstation... I just travelled two friggin hours just to get to Alabang... And another ride to stop in front of my workstation... These events just happened within half of my day...

I guess it was just like one of my favorite characters in a novel would have thought... Sometimes events with good or bad results may occur all over your life even at the same time... So I guess we'll just have to face them with hopes of getting over them sooner since I still have the half of the day to continue what I think I should do... And because we can't avoid them.... Unless you're a visionary or a psychic whatsoever...

Its Better Getting a Backache than a Heartache....

It is just like every muscle is pulling each other making the feeling really ugly...

As I was having my OJT in a car dealing business somewhere near a mall for socialites... I was getting very uneasy at my work on my workstation since there was a pain in my lower back like it was tearing my muscles apart... I tried to stand up and walk around a little so that it could go away. Well it did go away... For about some minutes or so... It was every time I was sitting and working on the computer that I get that feeling... And as I went home I thought I could loose this feeling... But to my lousy expectations... It was still there and still bugging me at this moment...

Why did I care to tell this? Because as I was traveling home... I had some weird thoughts (again) about somethings... I tried to compare it with what my heart feels right now... I think that its really better feeling this way than to feel something bad about love... Why? It's because with my physical pain, It can go anytime and there is an easy remedy... trying to rest is one thing because it may be just from the stress I had while trying to work... But with my situation about love...
I think I need a LOT of things to before I recover from it... And of course because my situation is kinda complicated... or so I think... But anywhos... I had another thought... and with a help from a quote I found on the internet... Maybe this pain from being busy is better to feel than what I feel about feeling something for someone whatsoever... I can keep me sane for a while... maybe...

“When thought becomes excessively painful, action is the finest remedy”

I Guess I Just Need an Outlet Again...

I opened my blog again... Why? I guess I just need something to be an outlet for my weird thoughts piling up in my head... I just want to put things in here to so that I can read something online... And so that I won't go crazy over silly things up in my mind...

As of now the only thing that I can say is that I am still living the same old same old way... Living with my weird principles in life where almost all people will think of it as stupid.. But I have been trying to defend my whole self by trying to tell myself... "Maybe I am still alive here in this world because I have been living with this thoughts... There's no problem with that I guess... I should not try to mind what other people say.... I can take their advice or more or less criticism to my advantage... I should try to analyze if those advice will be really good because its so stupid if you just obey what they say instantly... But even though... They are trying to help me...." Err... Well I guess that is what my mind is telling me...
Right now... these are the only thoughts running on my mind...

Maybe I can put something better here for anybody to be reading... Or until I tell something shocking to my friends like having a love life and so on and so forth and all that things...

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”